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The big moment finally came and you’re in a newly-engaged bliss bubble, admiring the look and feel of a brand-new sparkler on your hand and bouncing off the walls with excitement. It’s time to celebrate, but not too fast—avoid these common (and costly) mistakes from acting in the moment.
1. DON’T start inviting everyone to your wedding
Once you do, you can’t un-invite them, and you have no idea what your wedding plans are yet, and how much they will cost. You also don’t know how many people will be on your groom’s side of the guest list. Hold off until your wedding picture and budget start to take shape and it’s time for your save-the-dates. You’ll thank us then!
2. DON’T tell your bridal party you’ll pay for all of their expenses
This is a huge mistake made by brides and grooms who have the best intentions but no real way to know how their wedding expenses are going to add up. If, say, a bridesmaid agrees to be in your bridal party because you told her you’d pay for her dress, shoes, hair, makeup, travel and lodging, but then you later say you can’t swing those things, she’s going to be really upset and angry.
3. DON’T tell parents they can help plan whatever they want
Your engagement euphoria may blind you to the fact that parents can turn into steamrollers (e.g. inviting all of their friends, pressuring you to marry in the church where they married). It’s far wiser to hold off on promises and talk with your groom about what your top priorities are as a couple. Then, you can both decide which tasks can be delegated to the ‘rents.
4. DON’T promise everything to your people
Imagine how sad your groom and his relatives would be if you assigned “the good stuff” to all of your family members and friends, leaving his side to pick through whichever tasks are left. This doesn’t necessarily imply that you are trying to shun his family—it’s just easy to get caught up in the excitement of wedding plans.
Instead, be sure to ask your groom what his mom, dad and siblings would like to join in on, and you’ll set the stage for a close, loving relationship with the in-laws because you valued them enough to invite them into your planning circle.
5. DON’T fall in love with the first dress you see
Yes, we all know brides who bought the first dress they tried on, but this isn’t a task to rush through. Give yourself the opportunity to have magical dress-shopping experiences with your mom or MOH. You can certainly keep that first dress you saw in the running, but there’s no need to mark this task “complete” on your checklist before you’ve even had a chance to announce your engagement to loved ones.
