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Running a wedding these days seems to have become the equivalent to mounting a political campaign. There are more details to manage than seem possible. All for an afternoon party.
I believe your wedding is a very important event. But I believe its importance lies in the wedding vows you make before your community. The party cements good will, introduces the community to one another and allows you to celebrate this special transformation. I am not sure it requires the falderal that is currently fashionable. I am quite sure, having fallen victim to it myself, that it does not require the expenditure, particularly the last moment expenditure, that gets thrown at it.
Now it could be that you are singlehandedly looking to solve the economic crises by your wedding spending, but that's probably not true. You can not buy your way to a wonderful party. That happens with a good guest list and smart choices about entertainment and food.
Additionally, brides and grooms do not always have a great time when they have been busy beyond belief leading up to the wedding day. It's time to simplify and concentrate on what's important and what really matters to you.
What do you need to get married? The two of you, a celebrant and a great ceremony, your family and friends, a venue and some good food. Now go to a wedding fair and make a list of all the things you do not need for a wedding to happen. You might be astounded! You might also be freed!
What might help you look at all this differently?
- Relax . This is supposed to be fun. So concentrate on that. Sure, there will be moments when there's a lot to be done. But if you just get clear that you're going to have fun and stop doing things that are not fun, you'll have a better time. Because if it's stressful and horrible, you may not need to do it. Weddings are not about perfection, they're about love.
- Decide what's really important . What do you want to accomplish at your wedding? You want to get married with your family and friends in attendance. You want their support. You want them to mingle and get to know one another a bit. More? When the focus moves from your relationship to the production, you're probably not on track!
- Let go of unnecessary labor and expenses . Do you need a theme (beyond the obvious: marriage)? Do you need favors? Do you need programs? You need the food to be good, must it be fancy? How can you get married simply? If you want a challenge, why not choose that one?
- Work together . Make this something that you plan together. It's an old fairy tale that the wedding is for the bride. It's for both of you. Claim it, enjoy it, and plan it together. Do not start habits you have no interest in bringing into your marriage simply because you want to get the wedding organized.
- Keep your focus on your emerging marriage . Your relationship is the reason for this lovely event. Do not let go of that. Make the work you're doing together to produce your wedding, work you're doing to make your marriage better.
The process of getting married should be very like the process of being married. It should focus on making room for the two of you and your sweet love. It's not always easy to fit two personalities into a marriage. But that's the important work of the engagement process … not the delivery of a huge social event. And really, why are you getting married? If it's the party, go back and consider if this is a sound decision!
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Source by Ann Keeler Evans
