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Top Conversations to Have With Your Wedding Planner

Wedding Planner’s Questions

david tutera

Q. What kind of wedding would you like to have?
A. The answer I often get is “I want a unique, different, creative wedding” — which is not the answer I am looking for. Every bride wants something unique; I want to see how far outside the box the couple wants to go. The style and personality they want to come through are important, but I need to understand how far they’re willing to venture — and how much they’re willing to break with the formula of a traditional wedding.

Q. What’s your color scheme?
A. Surprise: A lot of my brides don’t have a ready answer. Think about specific colors, preferably bringing in fabric swatches, paint chip colors, magazine tear sheets — anything that depicts what you’re envisioning. Ideally, I like to see three color choices per palette: a primary color (your main color), a secondary color (your accent color) and a third color (what I call the finish color: silver, crystal, copper or gold).

Q. How would you like to infuse your personalities into your celebration?
A. I hope the couple answers by telling me more about who they are — the types of foods they love, their cultural backgrounds, stories about their relationship, where they met, etc. The reason I ask this is because I want to tell the couple’s story. The more personality and detail in your wedding, the more your wedding becomes your wedding, instead of the cookie-cutter format so many people tend to follow.

Q. What style do you live your life in?
A. Are you Modern? Classic? Eclectic? Traditional? Retro? I ask this question because the answer gives me a sense of who you are as a couple, as well as the way you like to live.

Q. What style would you like your wedding to be executed in?
A. The style a couple wants for their wedding may not be the style they live their lives by. It’s often more of a fantasy they want to live out for that day.

Brides’ Questions

escort card table
Photo Credit: Mel Barlow Co.

Q. How can I make my wedding different and unique?
A. It isn’t about trying to find a unique theme or concept that’s different because that doesn’t necessarily make sense for who you are as a couple. Instead, aim for a wedding that breaks the mold of the traditional formula and timeline that everyone else follows. Have some interactive participation so your guests can’t predict what’s around the corner, and they leave feeling like they experienced — experience is they key word here — something unique.

Q. Do I have to do all the expected formalities (e.g. first dance as husband and wife, father-daughter dance, mother-son dance, garter toss, bouquet toss, cake cutting)?
A. You don’t have to do any of it! It’s your wedding and it is completely up to you when it comes to these traditions. However, when making these decisions, take a moment to consider whether later in life you will regret not including them (e.g. having that special moment with your dad, your mom, etc.).

Q. Should we have an after-party or a separate late-night lounge area?
A. Neither. Both break the energy and flow of the celebration, and you can lose guests that way. Keep everyone within the four walls of one space and try not to spread out too much for too long a period of time. Instead, opt for switching up the environment over the course of the evening. Have a lounge area within your reception space, then change up the entertainment, music and lighting to create a new atmosphere and keep the party going strong.

Q. What are the season’s top color trends?
A. Rather than follow trends, try to pick colors that are unique to you, not specific to the colors of the moment. If you follow your heart and stay true to what’s meaningful and special to you and your fiancé, a beautiful wedding will unfold. 

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