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Now that more and more states and countries are achieving marriage equality, larger numbers of us have the joy of getting married to our partners. Gay wedding planning, though, can be a minefield, as most of us have never deal with the wedding industry before. Tales are abound of blown borrowers, undersized venues, ruined flower arrangements, and overstressed brides or grooms losing it on their wedding day. The purpose of this article is to help you avoid these pitfalls.

The very first step to planning your dream gay wedding is ignored by all too many couples, same-sex and opposite sex: make a detailed budget! You would not buy a car without carefully considering your budget first, would you? Yet, the average wedding costs the same as the average car, and many couples blindly enter the planning process without having a clear picture of what resources are available to them. When you start making your budget, think about how much you (or whoever will help pay) has to spend, then carefully consider your priorities. Do you want to have a huge wedding with all of your friends? Or is it more important to have a fabulous sit-down meal? Once you've got your priorities in order, it's time to work on the guest list.

The guest list is actually the "co-first-step" in wedding planning. Literally everything else depends on your guest list, starting with the size of the ceremony and reception venues, leading up to how much you'll have to spend on each individual element of your wedding – invitations, food, beverages, etc. If you start planning for that cute cottage in the Vermont countryside, then find out that you can not do with fewer than 100 guests, you'll have to start everything over from scratch. Or, you might discover that your dream wedding cake completely blows the budget when it's upsized for 200 people. This could lead to imprudent attempts to save money.

One disastrous I've seen some couples try to save money is by trying to get their friends to play professionals. Yes, Sara might make beautiful flower arrangements at home, but is she up to the task of creating 20 arrangements in a few hours? Will Tim's skills as a hobby architectural photographer translate into gorgeous wedding pictures? Do you want to risk ruining an aspect of your wedding – or even worse – a valued friendship? Work with professionals; it will save you a great deal of stress.

Another stress-busting factor that many couples forget about is a master of ceremonies. Trust me: you do NOT want to be in charge of everything on your wedding day. Choose someone who is calm under pressure, understands your vision for the wedding day, and shares your taste. Otherwise, you'll be running on your last nerves, finding your mother-in-law giving the OK to tacky decorations you hate, while the DJ cues up The Funky Chicken.

There you have it: some of the most common mistakes that couples make when doing gay wedding planning. Making a budget, clarifying the guest list, working with professionals, and choosing a master of ceremonies might seem obvious, but you'd be amazed at how many people forget to do so.

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Source by Jeremy Riegler