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As more states today are making gay marriage legal, wedding planners, officiants and other wedding industry vendors are expecting an increase in business with couples who are planning a gay wedding.
What's the difference between planning a lesbian or gay wedding and a non-gay wedding?
Actually, from what I'm reading, nothing really. Couples can plan the most beautiful and traditional wedding ceremony and reception as any other couple, as long as they find gay-friendly wedding vendors to help them.
The couple can go online and shop around for vendors for their wedding cakes, dresses, tuxes, suits, everything that any other couple needs for a traditional wedding. And the couple should still follow a good wedding planning checklist too when planning their event.
Lesbian and Gay Marriage Etiquette and Other Concerns
When it comes right down to it, the same wedding etiquette applies wherever two women are getting married, two men or a man and a woman.
Why? Because the rules of etiquette keep changing anyway!
May I have your daughter's hand in marriage?
Not all men ask their fiance's father for their hand in marriage. Today, the father may not even be in the picture for one. So really, it's not a must that one ask the other's father for permission, even in a gay marriage.
Also, the couple may already be living together and simply announce they've set their wedding date. It's pretty much already expected, once the daughter moves out and moves in with her boyfriend, that there may be a wedding some time in the future.
My parents do not approve. They will not support me.
There are a lot of heterosexual couples that run into this too, so there's no difference there.
My ex mother-in-law could not stand me and wanted nothing to do with her son marrying me because I was not a pure Catholic virgin.
Can we still have a religious ceremony?
There are non-dominant ministers who support gay marriage and will happily officiate your wedding. You should check some of the sites below. Some couples may already be attending a gay-friendly church where they can have their ceremony.
Do we both wear a wedding gown (or tux)?
For lesbian brides, yes, you can both wear your dream wedding dress. Or one of you can wear a feminine suit that coordinates with the others dress.
For gay men, you can wear matching tuxedos or suits, or wear different but complementary colors.
If you're having a bridal party, you can either have your own bridesmaids or you simply ask a competent of your best friends to stand for you.
Like I said, etiquette is a little more relaxed today than it used to be. In fact, there are some non-gay couples who have a female "best man" instead of a male, if it happens that the groom's best friend all his life happens to be a female.
There's really not a whole lot off limits today, regardless of the gender of the couple.
Is it hard to find gay-friendly wedding vendors?
Couples need to keep in mind that not every wedding professional or wedding vendor agreements with or feels comfortable working with a same-sex couple.
To help couples find wedding professionals, there are many sites available to help you find just the right sellers to work with, from finding a gay-friendly ceremony site, officiant, reception venue and everything else that goes into planning a beautiful wedding, to finding a friendly wedding planner or consultant that can handle all of the planning for you.
Remember, a reputable wedding planner will already have a whole list of vendors that he or she has worked with in the past. Then you just pay the professional to handle everything for you.
Gay Wedding Planning Sites:
- GayWeddings.com
- TheKnot.com
- EnGAYgedWeddings.com
- Iowa's Gay Wedding Planner
Is our gay marriage legal?
If you leave your home state to get married in one of the gay marriage states, will your marriage be legally binding in your home state if it is not a legal gay marriage state?
Couples that already live in states that allow gay marriage will have an easier time and a longer time to plan than a state that has recently made it legal but may overturn it at any moment. This happened in California between 2008 and 2013.
So many gay couples who live in states where gay marriage law has just been passed, are finding that they want to take that window of opportunity as quickly as they can, just in case the state overturns the decision and makes it illegal again.
According to NOLO Law for All :
"These issues are becoming clearer as time goes on. Right now, we now know that some federal agencies, such as the Social Security Administration, will continue to look to the place of residence (where a couple lives) to determine whether married couples qualify As benefits, as a result, same-sex married spouses living in non-recognition states will not be eligible for Social Security benefits based on their spouse's work record.
"But other federal agencies, such as the US Citizenship and Immigration Services (USCIS) will look to the place of celebration (where the marriage was performed) to determine whether same-sex married couples are eligible for benefits."
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Source by Karen S Musselman
